Someday is Today | Drama Queens

first of all you don't know me we're all

about that High School drama girl drama

girl all about them High School Queens

them forever we'll take you for a ride

in our comic girl cheering for the right

team

Dr fashion tough girl you can sit with

us girl drama queens drama queens drama

queens drama drama queens drama

queens that feels good I really love it

it's so fun isn't it we're back baby we

did it oh we survived all these years we

are reunited and it feels good every day

it really does you guys are more

beautiful than you've ever been and I'm

so excited we're back in the same room

together this is amazing it feels like a

homecoming it really really does like as

long as we played high schoolers we

might as well have our own like letter

jackets and high school reunion and we

deserve oh my God we deserve pink lady

jackets yes but ours would be blue right

and they

R how many times over the years have

people come up to you two and said like

when is there going to be a reunion so

much so many I've lost count honestly

it's probably the number one question

and it's fans of the show it's even like

the sweetest reporters we've ever spoken

to people you wouldn't expect to be

saying please give us a reunion do that

a lot I really like it when like people

who are from countries we had no idea

the show air in come up and they're like

we learned English watching your show I

know that's nuts it's been a comfort

food for so many people and it's because

of those fans because of all you guys

listening that we're even able to do

this right now we're so grateful and

super super excited to be back together

it's true though you know for us and

we've all talked about this in private

you know there were years where when we

finished the thing we did for a decade

we were like no we're done with that and

I think that the passion that the fans

have carried out has actually allowed us

to fall back in love with the show you

guys have given us Nostalgia you have

enabled us to maintain our friendships

and honestly our friendships are deeper

and more ferocious and delicious than

they've ever been cuz like we do get to

travel to all these cool places together

and meet you know the people who love

our show and you've reminded us that we

love our show and so now we're bringing

you a new

show did you guys ever imagine imine

when we were like locked down in

Wilmington North Carolina in the early

2000s that there would be a global fan

base never never me you always hope that

but you never actually I mean you can't

just sit around dreaming that there's

going to be some Global like Rush we're

going to become a major piece of pop

culture and then suddenly it happens and

I mean but you know you're you're so

what was 2003 was it when we started I

didn't even know how the internet worked

back then was your internet back then I

feel like it was still d up we using

like aim yeah what we all had home

phones back

then I'm going to call Joy on her

landline that's right landlines when it

was rude to call people on their cell

phones because you don't want to bother

someone when they're out I'll just call

you when you're home now it's like the

other way around what do you guys

remember the most about Wilmington like

let's talk about when we first I mean do

you guys remember when you first showed

up like landed in the that tiny little

airport yes well and always a con flight

cuz there's no direct flight into

Wilmington so you'd fly to Charlotte and

then you'd go get on the little plane

and I remember Landing in Wilmington and

getting off the plane and I was like oh

there oh there are six gates in the

whole airport there's rocking chairs out

front I was like can I sit in one of

those I love it here had you guys ever

been there before no see I was like a

Virginia kid so we would vacation down

there growing up and there was a there

was a place it was like Bubba's car lot

you know and it was all antique picture

cars that had been used in movies that

had shot there starting with like fire

starter you know so it had been a film

town since the 80s because Frank cpra

built screen gems there like 70s or '

80s right Lou velvet shot there so like

David Lynch came in and did super creepy

stuff Empire Records shot there which

wasn't a David Lynch movie but oh my God

it's

R the best I mean there were so so many

cool things that had shot there before

we got there and so for me it was like

oh I get to go live in a vacation town

where Bubba's Car Lot is you know like

cool and Dawson's had just like reigned

Supreme in wimington were you guys

allowed to watch Dawson cuz I wasn't you

weren't no it was a bad kid show what I

wasn't allowed to watch like Beverly

Hills 902 no but or Melrose Place God

forbid I still to this day I'm like what

not I could watch I watched 902 and0 to

a point and then there was an episode

where uh Luke Perry and Jenny G had like

an affair behind Shannon dh's back or

something never seen commercials about

that yeah I didn't even see the episode

I was actually like away at this is so

embarrassing I was away at space camp in

ID wild it's fine but my parents watched

the episode and when I got home they

were like you can't believe we've been

letting you watch this show with your

babysitter she's a bad influence and I

got a new babysitter and I was banned

from watching 902 and0

forever so I think because that show was

so bad is maybe why I was allowed to

watch Dawson's cuz it was like small

town kids figuring it out yeah dude I

remember having girlfriends over to

watch like the pilot of Dawson and when

pacy had sex with the teacher my mother

came in was

like I forgot about that too that was

like the first story line I came in on

DAW though I didn't start watching until

season like three or four when they had

sort of mellowed out it wasn't so much

of the trying to shock everybody because

Kevin Williamson was definitely in in a

shock Zone at that point when he started

all that I think maybe I must have done

the same I must have started watching it

later and then I remember being in

college and ahead of a Premiere a season

premiere going back and watching from

the beginning with friends and I think

that might have been the first time I

saw that yeah dude it I me it lit my

world on fire and all of a sudden then

everyone at school knew I wasn't allowed

to watch it they're like a nerd yeah but

in a you know we were all actors at that

point or joy you started really young

how old were you when you started

working oh my gosh well yeah I mean I I

started professionally when I was 12 so

um and but I was doing some kind of I

was doing a lot of theater I I mean we

were all we were all drama queens in our

own of of our high schools and schools

you know we all did drama club and and

school plays and all that kind of stuff

so that was and you for sure Hillary I

know you did a ton of musical theater I

was initiated into the high school

theater program when I was in third

grade I was eight with a letter

jacket because I I played gret Von trap

in The Sound of Music and then I

followed up in fifth grade with amaris

in The Sound of Music and so I thought I

was so cool an adult cuz I was like

who's amarillis in The Sound of Music

she's like the little girl that plays

the piano while Marian's singing good

night my someone and she's like oh the

music man what did I say Sound of Music

yes I was gring sound music the music

man lot of music happening in our house

I'm today years old always I learned

something about musicals from the two of

you every time we're together I'm like I

didn't I don't know nerd Club I love it

well I didn't start doing theater until

I had an Arts requirement in the eth

grade I tried to get out of it and I

tried to schedule my semester of theater

for the same semester I was playing

volleyball and my school was like you're

an idiot you can't do that so I had to

miss volleyball for the year which in

hindsight is a blessing cuz I never so

I'm not tall enough to be a volleyball

player I can see you being an aggressive

volleyball player you're competive

you're competitive for sure that I'm

like I can get in there I can help but I

um I suddenly I was like yeah just the

short kid being like give me the L ones

um but suddenly I was like wait a minute

I've been on this like med school track

I thought you know like good imigrant

daughter like you will be a doctor or a

lawyer or a lawyer or a doctor and then

I was like wait but play books come to

life but I missed the whole musical

theater there's still time babe there's

still

time learn our 100th episode will be a

musical podcast oh my God I can't wait

just you will write us a musical and it

will be fabulous oh

okay cradling your and your answer being

like all right I'm ready I'll start now

what show was on the air when we were

teenagers that you were like oh that's

what I want to do Felicity yeah Felicity

I got to be in a couple episodes of

Felicity you did yeah I

did rewind rewind yeah um I was uh her

her teacher was like um seemed like he

was hitting on her and it was there was

some episode where his teacher seemed

like he was hitting on her and um and

then it turned out that he was actually

like having an affair with me what and

you were also a student and I was also a

student but I also looked just like her

like my hair was really big and curly

and so I think maybe that there was a

tie in there where it was like he was it

was super weird I don't know but um I

can say everybody was really nice on

that show and Carrie I've always admired

her as an actress too but she was just

so sweet and professional and like

really warm and you know I mean people

and we know certainly being on a show

where people came in and out all the

time it's really hard to keep track of

all the guest stars and all the story

lines and everything and um but Carrie

was like I always felt comfortable

around her and she felt really warm and

welcome and come on in and the herir

makeup trailer there was never like

snobby or anything so um you know

whatever I had a great memory from being

on that show uh but what else was on the

WB at the time the WB was huge at the

time hug hug it owned our total age

bracket because it what Charmed was a

big deal y it would Charmed ficity

Dawson's Buffy Veronica Mars we grew up

on Buffy wasn't we Veronica Mars was you

p.m until it moved over until we merged

that happened in our merger well see yep

that was and that was nuts because they

were our competitor and we had this like

rivalry don't you remember the end of R

Kamar and their credits they had like an

icon of a tree burning and we took it so

personally remember that at all and then

we all merged and we were on the same

network and it was like oh it felt like

Westside Story it was just like cool I

guess we're friends now yeah the WB like

I'd interviewed a bunch of people from

other shows on the WB when I was working

at MTV but I was always on the other

side of it like I definitely wasn't the

talent I was just the interviewer and so

it was all the uh Smallville kids oh

small too oh my God and what was the one

with Gregory Smith uh

Everwood that was a big one forgot about

that

too Gilmore Girls oh my God they just

they were printing hits yeah they were

yeah they were and so if you were cast

on a WB show it was like just so funny

that every year we always felt like

we're on the bubble they may not pick

you up you know no we're not really sure

if anybody's into it would home know

that so explain to them what the bubble

is oh yeah yeah yeah okay so uh the

bubble is like you're you could burst

any moment you could be you could be um

canceled at any moment so better you

know stay in line better make sure that

we you know just keep our numbers up and

yeah do whatever we have to do to sell

sell sell the show and make sure that we

stay on the air um but it's ironic

because you know clearly at that time

the WB wasn't picking up shows that were

not going to be big hits let alone

keeping them on them on the air for

longer than longer than two seasons I

think is a fair yeah space of time to

say like by then they they know and yet

even into season five six seven8 well we

might get we might get canceled I know

every season I was there it was like

you're lucky to have a job you know and

isn't it funny that now as adults like

all of us producing and directing we're

like oh that's that's a scare tactic to

keep your employees terrified so they

never ask for anything got it thanks

guys but as kids we were like oh my God

we might lose our job this might be the

year we all find out we're failures you

know what has happened we've reached

that point in adulthood where we're like

fine I lose my job it's fine you know

like the apathy has set in but it you

know that was the biggest break ever

and trying to prove ourselves was funny

and also like a good way to have those

connections that make lifelong friends

it's like oh remember when we all went

through that together yeah it's like

having matching tattoos on the inside

yes oh I love that I almost got a tattoo

at your wedding so I did too almost yeah

the was just really long I was get it

later though I still got the be just got

it later I love it listen we had like 93

people get tattooed at my wedding we'll

do that on a different episode of the

show we'll just like bring oh my God yes

tatto um why not so what were you guys

doing like right before you were cast on

the show what was like the six months

leading up to finding out you were on

the show um I well I was uh I had just

moved from New York I I was um I had

been on a soap opera for a couple of

years and and then I just lived in New

York City doing nothing for one year I

spent all my money that I made on the

soap which you know what I was 19 or 20

and

like I'm making a stupid amount of money

which is just so unusual and I just it

was kind of great to just blow all of it

on like amazing restaurants and I saw a

Broadway show every other night and I

remember you telling me you're like do

you like champagne and I was like I

don't

know you were like I'm good at

champagne I mean I was like I moved out

when I was 7 I had my own apartment you

know and you know yeah like I had I'd

been kind of living on my own taking

care of myself for a long time so when I

got to La uh I I went to LA because I

was in New York I spent all my money I

went to the ATM one day and I had like

$2,000 left and you know I was like oh

well I guess I got to go to La and try

and get some guest spots so I just

packed up my

bags to La did you know where to go no I

mean I had been in La so much because I

had yeah pilot Seasons since I was 12 14

years old I was always flying out there

for um for testing and pilots and stuff

so anyway once once I got here um it was

it was stupidly Charmed like it just

kept working I just got here and I got

on guest spots and on all these great

different shows and started you know got

an apartment and um I got the the pilot

for uh Ravens was sent to me and I

flipped through it and I just was like I

don't know I don't know if I want to do

a teen drama and there were a lot of

other auditions at the time so I was I

just kind of passed by it and then six

or seven months later um my manager

called me and she said um watch this

pilot this is a a show the show I wanted

to you to audition for uh a few months

ago but um anyway they're they're

recasting one of the parts and if you if

you like it take a look so I took the

pilot the tape the video tape it was a

chunky tape I still have that chunky

tape man I took it over to a friend's

house and we sat down and watched it and

I loved the pilot I mean I really did

yeah I loved it I thought man I would

love to be a part of the show I love the

way they're weaving in music and the the

tone of the characters feels so raw and

connected and like this feels like

something I could really sink my teeth

into so um yeah I went in and and did my

audition we should all talk about our

audition experiences at some point too

oh my gosh but so what were you doing

before oh man I mean I was a junior in

college I um I had done this movie I had

auditioned for the female lead in Van

Wilder ooh um opposite Ryan Reynolds and

they were like you look 12 this isn't

going to work oh no you didn't I thought

you looked really pretty well they kept

bringing me back in and I I like I

eventually tested for the movie and they

were like we just think you look too

young to work oppos the part grown man

yeah and they were like but there's a

part there's one scene where there's

this freshman in college girl and we'd

like to offer it to you and I was like

wow this is cool and I remember getting

to work and and they were like okay so

um you're going to take that Mark and I

was like what is a mark yeah and Ryan

Reynolds was the sweetest person and he

was like come over here and he gave me

like a four lesson and was just like

this is a mark and what it means when

they say tow up and d d and look for

this and make sure no one's ever in your

light and I was like okay and then five

minutes later they were like so you're

going to like you know we're going to

smash cut to her walking in the room and

you're in his lap and you guys are

making out and I was like wow this is

tremendously awkward um thank God he's

such a nice person and he's like

remained the nicest human um but but I I

did that and then I I did this uh three

episode guest arc on Nip Tuck the first

season oh that's right yeah which was so

fun and so like salacious and out of

control and then I was like it was

summer and I was working my retail job I

was working at the Sentry City Mall

we're at which shop I was working at

Bloomingdales girl I did and I you're

like Rachel graen literally I I yes I

was I was following in Jennifer anison's

television footsteps and the anxiety

that I had every day cuz like all the

other kids who worked there were bad and

they would just take like extended smoke

breaks and I was having a panic attack

every day because I was trying to

recolor coordinate and arrange

everything on the shelves by size and

nobody else cared and I was like I can't

take it

anymore um and then this came up and it

and it was actually really interesting

because similarly to you I had read the

Ravens script and by the way for anyone

listening who doesn't know Winter Hill

was or originally titled Ravens you know

the name of the basketball team and um I

had read the script and I had wound up

doing a different pilot for the same

production company

to yeah and it was very in the line of

amazing WB shows um sort of like a

seventh heaven like really warm family

story oh that's another

one they just they printed hits I tell

you um but it was a pilot for ABC and

ABC was like we don't really need a

family show like this is cute but we're

not picking this up and fun fact Jeffrey

nordling from big little lies played my

dad and my God he's just been amazing

forever um but our show didn't get

picked up and then they were recasting

your part they were recasting Haley and

I got a call from one of the producers

who was on my pilot and on mry Hill who

was like you know we have these four

lead characters and all of them when you

meet them are really struggling with

something and we need messy sassy drama

drama and they were like we need a

character to be like ridiculous and

Sassy we need like comic relief Sassy's

a good word I was like Brook is is real

sassy and I was like that feels fun and

I remember going in and

auditioning um and then I had like I

think two more a call back and then

there was the test where they were

remember we were there together oh yeah

oh yeah I remember they were testing um

they were doing the well her name wasn't

even Brooke yet but they were doing the

Brooke characters and the and the

Haley's and it was this weird room I

remember that cuz it was like a circle

couch or something there was some kind

of like two half New Moon couches I just

remember walking in you were on your

headphones and I remember being damn it

I hope I'm that girl and I are not up

for the same part she's so pretty were

there other people there or was it had

my headphones in cuz I was having a

panic I was like I'm so nervous I don't

think I can talk to anyone because if I

start talking to people I might throw up

and that'll definitely mean I don't get

the J what fun oh God it was so

[Applause]

[Music]

nerve-wracking no I'd been in La like

six months before Ravens maybe even more

than that and I'd had one boyfriend you

know like I'd only had one boyfriend in

my whole life and his friend was getting

married out there so I piggybacked like

a couple auditions onto this wedding

trip and he was so pissed about it

because like he had to drive me around

it was La it was like before Map Quest

you know like it was you had to like

read a map to get

around oh my God I'll never lost so many

times reading that damn scary and so I

go to this audition for Mike Tolan and

he was directing radio with Cuba Gooding

Jr and I was auditioning for the part of

uh Ed Harris's daughter and I went in

there and I did it and it was like kind

of [ __ ] and he was like here's what we

need we need you to be more vulnerable

and like tell your dad that you need him

and I

remember like the look on my face cuz

your dad's a Green Beret right and I

looked at him and I said have you ever

been a teenage girl before like there's

no way no way I would make him think

that I needed him and they were like

well it's good to meet you my God

someone else is going to get this part

and so when I got cast I barely

auditioned for one true Hill cuz I think

they used all the old footage from that

audition they're like we need a [ __ ]

like there's this Burton girl and she's

awful and she's got so many opinions and

so I've just like made a tape in New

York with the casting

director and um I ended up getting the

job but it was all very like I'd never

met everyone anyone so when everyone was

talking about tests and things like that

I was like what is a test what are you

you guys talking about so when I showed

up in Wilmington everybody had already

met each other cuz they'd all read with

each other in auditions or tests

chemistry reads and stuff yeah wow I

just showed up and i' met Chad on

Dawson's Creek I'd done one episode i'

Done the 100th episode of Dawson's Creek

it was an episode where all those kids

go to the MTV Spring Break wait weren't

you playing yourself and I played myself

oh my God and it was it should have been

an omen because I remember you know my

character's name is Hillary they spelled

it wrong um but Katie Holmes was telling

me like uh that Chad's character was one

of the Hansen brothers and my line was

thank God you told me I probably would

have slept with him and now when you're

playing yourself you're very sensitive

about that especially when you're super

young and I was not a promiscuous woman

you're like I would never say that I and

so I said that I was like guys I got a

problem with this line and they're like

who is this little guest who's this

mouthy thing I was like I'm not saying

it and so it should have been an omen

for like the continuation of my career

down down in will years of I am not

saying this in this scene with this

person I'm not [ __ ] stuff is this God

yeah but Chad got into the van our very

first day we were like going to the

readr for the pilot and introduced

himself like we hadn't met and I

remember being like this is

war so all the like angsty [ __ ] stuff

was legit like I was just being so I you

know I was a jerk kid um I love it

brought that energy in it was real real

oh my God I love it what's crazy to me

is you telling that story makes me

realize that the three of us had the

exact same experience starting on our

show we all showed up to spaces where

everybody else knew everybody because

when we showed up you then had done the

pilot and you knew everybody but you

were meeting everybody for all the Haley

re-shoot for the first time that's right

and then when I showed up to start

working I had already been there for a

bit you had been there for a week cuz I

wasn't in the pilot I started in episode

one but they brought me out during the

pilot re-shoot scenes that you were

doing and and so it's blowing my mind

that the three of us women had the same

repeat experience that's weird that's

crazy and to learn that today is really

weird uh I apologize for bringing a chip

on my

shoulder like who are these

[ __ ]

we'll show them um what I think was

really fun is that we got to insert

little tiny pieces of our real selves

into our characters cuz I don't know

that our bosses necessarily knew what

they were doing a lot either it was new

for a lot of them and so we got to

influence little bits and pieces of who

our characters would become I actually

had been a cheerleader in high school I

was a very grumpy cheerleader in high

school I remember having like pictures

of Charles Anon and quotes of his on my

megaphone and like just just to be

counter yeah just to be a dick and and

so when they created this character I

was like whoa that hits close to home um

what were pieces of your characters that

really stood out for you guys either

that were there already or that you

inserted gosh I'm trying to think about

this because I have um well first first

of all I have the worst long-term memory

ever you could make [ __ ] up no one would

know

Jo um I mean I remember getting there

and being I was kind of like I said

already used to being dropped into new

situations on my own and just having to

sort of handle it and connect with

people and make friends I'd been doing

that for a while so and I'm such an

introvert that I was also like um just

wanted to spend time in my hotel room

and walk around on my own and the

Riverview suit yeah

and you know I'd walk around just like

being poetic and writing poetry on back

of napkins and things in my mind writing

songs and like just so awkward and

didn't know how to actually have a real

like spending time getting to know

somebody just so I think a lot of my

experience was colored by that um but in

terms of Haley and and being on set I

mean I

remembered I what I remembered shooting

the scene in the cafe with Karen and the

chili and some thing about magazine

Pages being being

sticky we're going to have to when we

rewatch this pilot we'll know what I'm

talking about but there was something

about that and I'm was like mouthing off

to Lucas and it felt very comfortable um

Moira and Chad were both really

welcoming and really um encouraging and

um I felt like I had room to play and uh

and I think I I resonated with the sense

that Haley felt kind of introverted and

awkward and didn't really know how to

connect with people because even though

I'm I'm an extroverted introvert because

of my business I've learned how to um

walk into a room and manage having a

conversation connecting with lots of

people and being charismatic but inside

I'm crawling into a hole and like can't

wait to be alone yeah so um I think

there was a lot of of that part of me

that I recognized in Haley and you know

connected with that what about you s oh

man it was really interesting because

there was a there was a

boldness

to Brook Davis well actually I need to

rewind her name wasn't even Brook Davis

yeah it was teror Terra oh my gosh

that's right like 1,000% no not that

there's anything wrong with Terra not

that there's anything wrong but like

that was not her name you know like it

doesn't it doesn't it just doesn't feel

right Brook is an expensive name it is

and you know what's so funny is I

remember when we were getting everything

settled and uh one of our writers was

like well what name do you like and they

suggested a couple and my best friend

from college is a girl named Brooke no

way and she is just like one of those

people who is so Chic like she can put

on something that is actually like

expensive and beautiful or she can put

on a Zara t-shirt and it looks like it's

a designer like like somebody else we

know dance over here that's very sweet I

always am like this is like a nice

outfit why do I look like a teenager boy

in this is how I feel every day also

like every single day I wear a pair of

jeans and an oversized Blazer but this

is not the point important I do love a

uniform but I I and I just there was

something about like her spirit even in

college like I similarly to you I think

I know how to I know how to show up in a

room I know how to do my job I'm really

really good at being bold for other

people but I've realized as a grown-up

who has spent invested money in therapy

um I'm actually historically I have not

been good at being bold for myself and

my friend Brooke from college was so

unabashedly bold and was never ashamed

of anything and never embarrassed by

anything and and never worried she was

offending anyone she was so herself and

I knew that this character was supposed

to be like that and I think the

interesting thing is that I learned a

little more about how to do that for

myself because I played Brook Davis and

I brought like deeply self-conscious

fear and um and and self-searching to

her and I I think I was able to humanize

her because very similarly to you and I

know we all experienced this on our show

there were things that were written for

me to do as this person that I just

refused to do I said I'm not doing this

yeah we all had moments like that for

sure we all had that and and I think

there was something really beautiful

that that we got to be inspired by our

characters we got to inspire our

characters and weirdly we stuck up for

each other like I'm like oh Brook Davis

and I stuck up for each other every day

you know that's a good way to think you

know I feel that it I feel like pton so

is a very different person than I am and

I'm so defensive of her cuz she's like a

broken Winged Bird you know and and

there are other people in our industry

who have done teen dramas who try to

distance themselves from it it's like

guys it's a genre we make fun of you

know what I mean and so for me always

like owning her and defending her has

been it's been a life's work but also

like have we forgot what is their show

uh uh uh come on CLA Dan's and Jared

Leto's classic whole life like they're

two of my favorite actors who make the

most incredible Academy Award nominated

films we've ever seen like I don't hate

a teen drama I love it I think it makes

you great people love them love and you

said something that I thought was was so

smart girl all day this is my I know

exactly what you're going to say you

tell it's your Mantra and I love it

listen all these folks out there winning

Awards with good scripts I'm not

impressed because if you can take a

script and make it relatable and

watchable and like make somebody cry

you're a winner I agree and I think

about that so often and I'm like if we

can make You Weep and have a deep talk

with your family after an episode of our

show on a very mediocre script 98% of

the time can e a heart exactly we can we

can jump sharks and you still love us

like come on that that takes some real

medal if I may say so for all of us yeah

so in watching in watching this guys I

have listen I have not seen anything

since I left I either like no not and I

never saw the last three seasons cuz I

was like off having babies and like you

know just on a different planet and so

Frank

I'm nervous about rewatching because

it's like I know it's going to be

painful to watch myself learn how to act

on camera like it I wasn't in class I've

taken classes for years i' done theater

forever but TV acting is so so so

different I am I am also nervous to

rewatch because

I I know where my personal life was

during those 10 years

and I I know what

I your literally whole face just turned

red your literally whole face just turn

red

go we got a lot in common ladies yeah

but I like I when I think back on

there's so many parts of myself that I

also have invested money in

therapy and have you know done a lot of

work as as you do when life kicks your

ass and um and when I think

about the sort of superiority complexes

that I had back then and like how

judgmental and like how like there was

just so many things that I look back on

my younger self and you we I don't know

if you guys do but I cringe at a lot of

those moments I mean I'm still learning

to forgive myself for just being human

and growing and learning but I think

back and I know I inserted so much of

that into Haley and so when I watch her

when I have seen Clips or things come on

I always cringe cuz I'm just like oh God

she's so like that's is that what I was

like oh God I'm so sorry

iable oh man well you know what's so

interesting to me about it though is I

also feel like and we've had this

experience the three of us over the

years and and you know we've talked

about this with the fans so many of you

listening at home probably know facets

of of these stories but there was so

much not only of of us as young adults

who by the way knew nothing we were

learning in real time it's the first

time a lot of us were away from our

parents like ever like it was kind of

like being pushed off a cliff and trying

to get your like skydiving backpack on

at the same time it was really it's a

wonder none of us is dead so

congratulations way all the cats like

we've thrived really everyone's a lot

like we're doing great you as you you

said last night at dinner we all had

dinner last night and you said you were

talking about uh the the benefit of

being in Wilmington when we weren't

being able to be snapped by Paparazzi

coming out of a restaurant you know like

that stuff messes with you when you're

that young and no wonder a lot of a lot

of you know kids without guidance and

without their parents still there just

kind of went off the rails you know that

and I don't know that we would have been

any different if we hadn't been

protected by our location in a lot of

ways I mean even the aspects of it that

we did experience were really

traumatizing for me yeah like I it was

so hard handle this notion that everyone

wants you to fail so they can make fun

of you but also you're meant to be

perfect but no one knows how to be

perfect let alone an adult cuz we were

20 years old and like I mean I you know

children we were children the only thing

that ever cuz I was always like drunk

hung over like I that's going to be the

hard part of watching this for me is

like oh that's a Hang Fire Valley I I

was a brute um but the only Paparazzi

mess I ever ran into was was at this

hotel no way we are at the W Hotel in

Westwood and I came out in like season 5

or season six to start pitching TV shows

that I'd created with my little brother

Billy and so Billy had worked on our

show Billy and I are staying here maybe

in even in like one of these rooms cuz I

knew it had like two bedrooms here and

the next thing I know like the magazines

reporting Hillary Burton seen laughing

over dinner at the W Hotel with a

mystery

man I was like it's my brother

eoss but it was late you know and I felt

so violated and that happened to me once

you know and and so I can't imagine

you're right the kids that are just

under the microscope all the time but

it's so interesting because when we

think about it there was that external

attention there was the the very real

world of what we were learning on set

and being human beings making mistakes

and you know being G over and figuring

it out

and and you know never hung up never

never it's part of my problem by the way

we'll get you there we're making up for

it but yeah believe me I've done since

then I think that there's something so

interesting also

about our ability now the privilege

really of getting a version of a doover

of this female friendship that is so

important to the three of us that has

been such a Lifeline we do have these

tattoos on the inside that nobody else

has has and we've been able to be like

oh wow weird to learn that there were

some adults who didn't want us to be

friends cuz they thought we would

negotiate together so they like pitted

us against each other at 20 that's dark

like yeah and and yet no matter what

anybody ever tried the ways they wanted

to mess with us or the way the industry

was trying to mess with kids in the

early 2000s or anything like the three

of us came out like Jones of Ark like

just out of the fire like what can't

[ __ ] with us and I really I love it I

just it all of us got involved in

advocacy we're all a little Surly um I

would say who us who us no never no I

mean I think rewatching it together as a

group is going to be fun because I

didn't know what you guys were going

through on the show and so and all we

could do especially that age is assume

like that's one of the things that we

don't at that time I guess when we were

being raised different generation

T I had a Motorola Razer I thought I was

so cool flip our phones open and be like

wow that T-Mobile one that was like a

sidekick oh my God whatever the sound of

the sidekick opening

the and then the soft keys the like

T we weren't taught how to be like the

value of being vulnerable with each

other and so that it was okay to just be

like guys I feel insecure when I'm

around you and all you're doing is

talking and bouncing off each other and

I don't know what to say and I can't

keep up and like can you just like make

space for me like I nobody would have

taught me to say that when I was it's

just not wasn't part of the generation

we were raised in but we can now and it

feels so special and I I think about all

the young women who reach out to all of

us all the time who are watching the

show now and who talk about how

important our onscreen friendships are

and I'm like man we're getting the

better version of any version of a

friendship we had on screen or otherwise

we're getting it now in our adulthood in

this new era to your point Joy of like

women actually being taught to go to B

for each other instead for themselves

yeah like we're not each other's

competition we're each other's greatest

Champions but back then everyone around

us wanted us to compete with each other

and I don't know I think that all the

stuff that's so scary to watch I'm so

relieved I get to watch with you guys

Joy's The Talented one Sophia's the

gorgeous one and you're the angry one

and I was like

what said to you yeah yeah horrible

things it's not wrong it's like I was

pretty angry

you're all so beautiful and well I think

we all do okay for ourselves but in

doing this I think those titles are a

fun thing to poke at you know like we're

going to have our friends on the show

Lee had his experiences Antoine James

all of our peers also had those

experiences so throughout the course of

this whole series like I'm excited to

have them on cuz they're going to have a

totally different experience experienced

things we never did for sure

this is what you were saying Sophia is I

think one of the it's the biggest reason

why we wanted to do this podcast because

as as fun as it is to reconnect I love

doing this with you girls and you know

yeah this is this is such a cool revisit

to a major pop culture moment yes but

the fact that now as as older women you

know Hillary and I are moms raising

young girls also um just being able to

offer to the younger generation a vision

of what a Sisterhood can look like um

for women who grew up watching the show

to be able to revisit that maybe with

some of their girlfriends you know maybe

you'll you out there listening will

learn along with us some of the things

that we um are some of our takeaways

some of the things that we're learning

as we heal in some ways which I'm I

think this is going to be healing in a

lot of ways watching well second season

mullet I had I don't know if I'm

ever oh my God yeah yeah but anyway I

just think I think it's going to be

great and I think um I'm really excited

because I think that's going to be

really helpful for a lot of um a lot of

young women tuning in yeah yeah I do too

all right let's get weird um sorry you

can always count on me to be sincere

listen you can always count on me to

ruin it because I'm like feelings are so

we love to lean in and Hillary's like I

got a joke I got a joke I got a

j feelings where yeah this is why I was

always hung over this is why we're we're

a good unit yeah it's it's we you were

cast really well and it's weird to think

that there was a person out there who

was responsible for choosing our

friendships for us um and for me as a

kid that was hard cuz I was like you

can't tell me who to be friends with but

like they did a really good job like we

all turned out great and the conventions

we do are so fun and so this is an

extension of that should be great um so

yes we're you know we've got a

whole how many seasons n

we have

187 hours of television what we do it's

so many hours it's so many hours yeah

that's a lot it's a lot like when we get

those messages and someone's like I'm

re-watching it from the start for the

fourth time I'm like thank you and also

do you have

homework or like a job are you really us

okay hang in comfort food yeah who's

going to be the person you're most

excited to have on and pick their brain

Paul's goingon to be a blast look no lie

that's going to be fun he's got a lot of

energy I also I can't wait to hear

moira's perspective cuz like she was our

age when we started our show yeah and

now I'm like were we I just want to look

at her and be like were we idiots oh did

you like us she's going to have so much

to say I love her and Barbara too was so

fun anine for me is so fun because his

perspective on had like kids who were

teenagers when we were shooting the show

and so he also was removed from it in a

way where he could just watch us like

spin our wheels and be messy and loved

it he Lov it like when Anton called you

and was like you need to go out tonight

we're going to sidebar you know like you

knew all right I'm going to get a

lecture tonight and he would just make

sure that everything was cool he was

like a good

negotiator yeah yeah anon's the party he

really is and for anyone listening at

home who might not know Paul played and

Moira played Karen Barbara played Deb

and Antoine played

[Applause]

skills when you think about the sort of

Epic feeling of oh my god I've been cast

on a WP show do you guys remember

because I when I when I think about

landing at you know our sweet little six

gate airport which by the way when we've

gone back for conventions I'm like I

just love it here it still smells the

same like it's the smell the smell it's

perfect but I remember leaving the

airport and I had to go straight to the

studio for like a first meeting and when

I pulled into screen gems the side of

one of the stages had that huge Dawson's

Creek mural on it and I just remember

thinking oh my God I'm here yeah and it

was so great like at big is happening

right

now it I was just kind of the days till

our own big old heads got put up on the

side they put and they

did put us like the side of the

cafeteria like that building the entire

side wall yeah yeah yeah I was down with

that we all landed in different parts of

town too like when you first get cast on

a Warner Brothers show you all stay at

like the Riverview Suites in Wilmington

you know which is the site it was like

an extended stay hotel yeah but then we

all went off and picked our own places

to live and joy you were at the beach

right didn't you go to the beach season

one

um oh my gosh I think I did because that

was the year we got that those dogs

remember Sophia we got those dogs oh we

went on a Saturday and got puppy I know

um yeah what I wasn't invited to puppy

day I was hung

over party um I was at the

so angry I moved downtown second season

so yeah I think where did you go well I

the very first place I got because they

put me up for the pilot and then it was

like okay child here's a chunk of money

go find a place to live you know like

I'd never signed a lease on my own

before I didn't know how to do that and

so I found an apartment for like

$650 a month that was directly across

the street from Karen's Cafe I was

living above

Firebelly and it was the first time I'd

ever lived alone and there was this dude

next door to me who was so scary his

name no was Glenn he if he's listening I

don't even care that you know you're

scary because you're listening to this

which proves you're

scary so anyway Glenn was so weird and

like would lean out on his balcony to

peek in my balcony oh God and then I

found these holes in the wall and I no

you did not but I didn't know if it was

just a shitty building or like Glenn was

like Anthony Perkins psycho H in the

wall so I was so scary so that is when I

started inviting the crew to come over

every time they wrapped at Karen's Cafe

just cuz I didn't want to be by myself

and so I ended up having like ragers at

this little $600 apartment did um and it

was fun like it was a great time I was

not far I was also off Front Street the

first apartment I found was oh you had a

nice I loved that apartment it was just

in such a weird little building I think

there were only like four Apartments

there was a weird staircase that went up

the side of every level and I think it

was like two apartments per floor it was

basically the unused space that someone

realized they could be making money on

cuz it was the other side of the rooftop

of the real Cafe oh that's right I

remember that brick wall it was all that

exposed brick because I think it had

been outside and then they just made it

inside and they put these four

apartments in this like random space Co

and it was so cool and I remember having

to negotiate with the parking lot across

the street cuz there was obviously like

there was no parking there was no

nothing I negotiated with the parking

lot that was across the street that was

like a you know pay by day place and I I

like ran around until I found the owner

like in a bar one day and I was like Hey

like I live across the street and is

there any way I could just like pay you

every month to park and I I paid $95 a

month to have a parking spot that's so

much money which was so much money to me

at the time and I think about like

people complaining about how in New York

they have to pay $1,200 a month for

parking like wow maybe I shouldn't have

been complaining but we were just so

broke and like you know I it was all so

weird I remember you know you get your

like little they give you a couple

thousand dollars and they're like buy

your own plane ticket and then move

across the country with all your stuff

and you're like okay like it's all so

scary and but I loved that apartment I

think you have a bunch of scrapbooking

stuff came over to pick you up and

you're like this is my scrapbooking room

so into it I was so my whole quote

dining room table whatever that was was

just covered in photo

album and I think I was into it for like

a year and then was like well well I

just have a I have a lot of I have a

what's that called um decopage no the

the oh card stock card stock yeah see

look SC with like the weird edges weird

edges I was like I'm going to card stock

and I'm going to make board ERS and it's

going to be beautiful and then I was

like no I'm not no I tried tried listen

we've got a whole TV show that's the

Scrapbook but see this is the thing even

when it's not going to last I'm really

committed to the thing I decide I'm

going to try to do even if it's just for

a moment there so many hobbies that I've

been like scrapbooking I'm going to do

that yeah I'm going to learn how to I

don't know play the guitar never did

that either but I have one do you of

being an artist though I think you

explore all these different

ideas fit the best that's right we all

picked up weird hobbies to keep

ourselves busy on set yeah a lot of you

know pre-social media now everybody just

like Scrolls through their phone we

actually talk to each other and read

books and had knitting circles kind of

not really we would interrogate the new

kids we got dogs yeah guys I didn't get

a dog I think I did Little Annie she was

such a good dog in Carolina Carolina

Carol remember that little golden yeah

little golden was it she lab or

retriever I don't know what she was they

were they were were cute little farm

dogs yeah she ended up on a farm I just

wasn't ready to take care of an animal

that that juncture in my life but I am

now um listen before we wrap up I have

um kind of a little surprise for us I

like

surprises Joy always has good surprises

yeah oh okay so this was given to me

by um one of our executive producers

Greg PR at the rap of the pilot

congratulations of the of

the it could have been the end of season

one it it was a big gift so maybe it was

the end of season one I'm not sure I

just remember having this it was

definitely like the first at the very

beginning I mean that's this is a 1996

box of Don Peron and uh it's not a box

it's a bottle a box with a bottle it

yeah Joy what did you do we didn't do I

thought everybody was like I think you

truly like reot the pilot you got a

present I guess that was what it was to

the pilot um so anyway I've been saving

it for you know since

200 2001 I guess right3 don't make it

worse 200 200ish 2003 um but let's pop

it open and my god let's actually enjoy

this bottle that I've been saving for

exact

the right moment is there anything more

dramatic and fancy than a vintage girl I

love fancy and by the way like it's so

nice to be in a moment where you know

it's special like when we were kids I

don't know that we recognized it all the

time and so reuniting now feels good cuz

we know it's special and Joy's G

to okay it was H wow that was very

professionally done thank you I drink a

lot of champagne yeah apparently oh look

at the color this is like a nice amber

color um you're welcome listen I have

moved several times with this bottle so

there's a good chance it's terrible but

honestly that would be kind of we're

such good actors no one will ever know I

love you guys love you

guys here's two drama

queens oh yeah that

works oh wow well kids we're going to

have a great time now are we'll see you

next week what are we doing next week

next week we're we are rewatching the

pilot so before you watch our show I

mean if you if you want to participate

go watch the pilot and then uh and then

come listen we're going to have a nice

chat about all the fun things we

remember and who else knows what else is

going to come up little Bish talk just a

little just a little we deserve

it the he everybody we deserve it we

deserve

it bye

[Applause]

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