The Invisible Struggles of the Eldest Daughter

Nobody really talks about what the

eldest child is going through,

especially the eldest daughter. Even as

kids, they hear things like, "Be a good

girl. You represent this whole family."

And when a younger one is born, she's

the one who has to give up the toy

first. The one who gets blamed when the

younger one cries. Suddenly, she's

expected to take the responsibility for

the younger one like her second parent.

And she will be constantly praised for

being mature, the good girl and

sacrificing nature. So what happens is

all this becomes her core identity, her

personality. When this child grows up,

she takes more responsibilities than she

can handle. At work, at home, in

friendships and relationships, she'll be

the fixer, the strong and the efficient

one. Even when she crumbles inside, she

won't express it or ask for help. When

she prioritizes herself, she'll feel

guilty. It's like she always carries

that eldest daughter title with her

everywhere she goes. It's called the

eldest daughter syndrome. This is not a

clinical term but it is very