You'll never see people the same after this | Mel Robbins #Shorts

Every adult you see is just an

eight-year-old in a big body. That's it.

Because nobody actually

knows how to be emotionally mature

because it's not something you're born

with. It's a skill that you have to want

to learn and that you have to practice.

And none of our parents knew how to do

it. So, you didn't get it in your

childhood. I don't care how calm and

stoic you may be. learning how to

recognize your emotions and actually

feel them and then understand how to

process them in a calm manner without

like again taking it out on other

people. That is a super I didn't learn

how to do this till I was 54. Who wants

to do that when I can just point fingers

and talk about people? You can and then

you're going to die of a heart attack

cuz you're chronically stressed out and

you're going to feel powerless in a

world where you actually have a lot of

power and you're going to miss out on a

lot of your life because you have put

all of the power over there which is why

it's pissing you off and why you're

frustrated. And so I think that this has

in terms of the emotional immaturity

looking at somebody that's 8 years old,

especially somebody that has like very

challenging behavior. What happens is

you don't fear people, you actually feel

a level of compassion for them. Like if

you look at somebody who is passive

aggressive, that's a child who

pouts. If you look at somebody in your

family that gives you the silent

treatment, which is very common in our

parents' generation, you just stop

talking. You punish the person by

removing yourself and then 2 days later

you pretend like nothing ever happened.

Highly emotionally destructive like

behavior to a child in particular. But

if you have an adult in your life that

ghosts you or that gives you the silent

treatment that is punishing you because

they can't have a conversation that's a

little difficult or they're having

emotions like disappointment or anger or

frustration and they have to punish you.

That's an 8-year-old. That's an

8-year-old who pouts. Because an

8-year-old that goes in the corner and

pouts, what are they doing? They're

overwhelmed with their emotion. So, they

go away hoping the adult comes over to

soo them. That's exactly what adults do.

and you get to choose. So, you're going

to let them because you're not a parent

to another adult. It is not your job to

manage somebody else's emotions. You let

them do what they're going to do and

recognize, okay, that's a person that's

8 years old. And only they can do the

work to learn a different way to cope

with their emotions. And now, let me

choose how do I want to respond to this.

Am I going to spend a little less time

with this person? Am I going to go over

and choose to sue them because I know

this person's story and I'm just want to

facilitate something here? But you get

to choose. You don't have to be the

victim of their behavior.