Tom Pelphrey | Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

I feel like this is a very long time

coming.

>> I know, brother. We have so many friends

in common.

>> Well, Zeers for sure.

>> Zagers.

>> Who else?

>> Well, I just feel like from that world

there must be more.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

>> I guess I missed.

>> There's no chance we've ever been in a

meeting together, is there?

>> I can't remember.

>> But I did have a panic this morning

like, oh my god, what if we were in a

meeting together forgotten? What dated

in the past?

>> Where do you have to be at 12:30? I'm so

curious.

>> Be honest. something for a photo shoot

and some kind of interview, but I don't

really know what it is. Okay, that's

good.

>> You're just getting carded from place to

place.

>> I just [ __ ] honestly they tell me

where to go. I say, "Okay, do my best to

show up."

>> That's right. That's good.

>> Yeah. Have you had to adopt that

strategy? Because I kind of watched my

wife operate that way. For years, I was

like, "I need to know everything I'm

doing so far out in advance, like

control freak, and then I'd watch her

just kind of wake up and figure out what

she's doing that day." And it worked out

just fine for her. And so slowly I've

been like, "Oh yeah, I'll figure out

what I'm doing tomorrow." Have you

always been this way or did you evolve

to this?

>> No, I've kind of always been this way,

but to the to to the extreme that it was

um not great.

>> Okay. Little

>> Yeah, really just not thinking at all

about

>> waking up in interviews basically.

>> Just thinking about tomorrow. Yeah. Um,

but yeah, I mean I

Yeah, I guess I guess it is a a a a good

thing to to do to not think too far

ahead when you're busy because then you

get a little overwhelmed.

>> Well, I I just produce a bunch of

anxiety obviously cuz I'm not in today.

I'm like focused so much on tomorrow.

>> Is that what you fit? Do you feel like

you're more prone to have anxiety?

>> Yeah. You know, I have zero in my waking

hours. Like if you ask me, do you have

anxiety? No, I don't. At night, clearly

I do because I wake up many, many nights

a week and just ruminate on stuff that's

coming up in the future for an hour. So

clearly I do have a lot of anxiety, but

when I'm awake, I'm not fearful of it.

>> It wakes you up from sleep.

>> Oh, yeah. Yeah.

>> Huh. Have you ever read Yung Carl Young?

>> Carl Young. No. Just so much of it is is

you use the subconscious like so often

in in a Yungian session you'll just talk

about your dreams and I wonder if these

things are waking you up in the middle

of the night that there might be a way

in there that that that you're not

consciously experiencing it but maybe

there's something deeper.

>> Yeah. I mean I was just in Nashville for

a week where we have a house and I don't

work there

>> and I sleep like a baby there.

>> Wow.

>> And I don't ever wake up with anxiety

because I had literally nothing to do.

>> Yeah. But you how what's your anxiety

level?

>> Not high. Not very high. Again, back to

the not thinking too much into the

future. If anything, in the past, and

this is a lot less so recently, but I

would feel depression at times.

>> Okay.

>> You know, I feel like some some people

are kind of more one way, some people a

little bit more the other.

>> So, just like melancholy.

>> Yeah. Just just like a kind of sadness

sometimes coming out of nowhere, like

not necessarily attached to anything.

>> Yeah. And then the future is bad, right?

When and you're in that state, it's not

full of opportunity and hope. It's full

of more.

>> Everything feels bad in that state.

Everything just gets kind of gray.

>> Yeah.

>> Yeah.

>> Maybe you're not even thinking about

tomorrow or the future. It's just like

right now is bad or just like feels like

heavy.

>> Yeah. It just kind of comes on and

that's an interesting thing to observe

to you. You you know echartole if you

guys read power. Yeah. That book really

changed my life in in a lot of ways. But

he sort of says even the way you talk to

yourself about it even saying instead of

I'm sad to say I have a sadness in me to

acknowledge it's not who you are and

also that it's sort of transitory. It's

temporary.

>> Yeah.

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How Township, New Jersey. This is uh

this is a suburb of New York Cityish.

>> It's in the area the met

>> central Jersey. Jersey Shore.

>> Oh, Jersey Shore.

>> Bruce Springsteen.

>> Okay. Okay. And then recently we just

>> Yes. Charlie Poose.

>> Charlie Poose.

>> Okay.

>> Yes. A claim to fame.

>> We have a lot of Jersey boys and gals.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

>> Um, how far to New York from Howell

Township?

>> Hour 15 with decent traffic.

>> Okay. And how close to the Jersey Shore?

>> Oh, 10-minute drive.

>> 10 minutes. So, did you grow up hanging

around the the boardwalk of the Jersey?

>> Really?

>> Oh, yeah.

>> Okay. And was it similar to what I

watched on um MTV?

>> Like there were a lot of Guidos with

gold chains.

>> There is a lot of that. But the problem

the problem that we had with what was

that show called? Jersey.

>> Jersey Shore. Right.

>> Aptily named.

>> Yeah. The problem we had with that show

was all the kids on that show I think

minus one were all from Long Island.

They were very Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

>> But no, that is kind of the vibe. That's

like a That's like a Seaside Heights

kind of vibe, which I think is where

that show was filmed. Depending on the

beach you go to, you get a very

different, you know, flavor, very

different color.

>> Yeah. Yeah.

>> Yeah.

>> Um, what was your little click in that

world? What kind of dudes did you hang

out with? I'm seven years older than

you. Okay. I think I have some idea of

what was happening seven years behind

me, but

>> Well, I I got I was very fortunate. So,

I still I just was back in New Jersey

for a few weeks. I still have some of my

best friends that I've truly

>> been friends with since I was four years

old.

>> Oh, wow.

>> So nice.

>> Yes. It's incredible.

>> Very lifeaving.

>> Yes. It It's such a beautiful thing to

be able to have those kind of friends

still.

>> And so we were kind of a mixture. There